Is There a Positive Side to a Prenuptial Agreement? - Carrie Schwab ...

Dear Carrie, My fiance and I are both in our mid-30s, so we've each had time to accumulate some assets. I'm thinking we should have a prenuptial agreement, but he thinks it's a betrayal of trust. What do you think? --A Reader

Dear Reader, In my opinion, there are a lot of positive reasons to have a prenuptial agreement. While I understand your fiance's hesitation -- so often a prenup is associated with divorce -- to me it's not a sign of distrust. In fact, creating a prenuptial agreement takes a willingness to be completely open and honest about everything -- what you own, what you owe and how you want to live your financial lives together. That takes absolute trust.

Plus, there's a basic tenet in any prenup that you can't include anything that a court would consider "unfair" to either of you. There's lots of room for different arrangements, but fairness is a given.

That said, a formal prenuptial agreement is most important if either one of you has considerable assets, large debts or kids from a previous marriage -- anything that makes your finances more complicated. If this isn't you, a formal agreement is less necessary. Every couple, though, should provide complete financial disclosure and share their feelings about money. This will undoubtedly head off disagreements down the road and create a closer bond.

Here are some practical financial issues I believe every couple should discuss before they walk down the aisle.

--What assets you'll share and what you'll keep separate

You say you've both accumulated some assets, so start there. Property-wise, what do you own? Where do you keep your money, and how is it invested?

Look at the whole picture -- savings, investments, retirement accounts, real estate, cars, artwork, jewelry -- and decide what you'll share and what you'll keep separate. Then ask yourselves questions like: Will you pool your money to buy a house? Do you want to keep individual control of a certain amount for some personal future goal?

One common approach is to consider all assets owned before the marriage as separate and assets acquired after as joint. Just remember that if you co-mingle any separate property (for example, if you combine your separate accounts into a joint account, and then make deposits and withdrawals), it becomes jointly owned.

To me, there's nothing wrong with a little financial independence in a marriage. In fact, I think it's important for every adult to have a degree of financial autonomy. But it's important to agree on what that means at the outset, so there are no hurt feelings later on.

Source: http://townhall.com/columnists/carrieschwabpomerantz/2013/04/18/is-there-a-positive-side-to-a-prenuptial-agreement-n1569508

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